Chapter 21: Action, Reaction, Motivation, Emotion

Cassandra sat still on the couch, desperately trying to make sense of everything she just heard.  Not the second fiance, the forth; not the second wife, the third.  There had been nine other women.  Cassandra wasn't a prude but nine seemed a bit excessive.  They sat in silence when all of the anger and confusion flooded her senses, pulled back, and hit her like a tidal wave.

Cassandra flew off of the couch.  Her voice raised , teeming with mistrust and contempt, "Are you serious Don?  You just want this to be out there now and for us to go on like nothing has happened?  I'm not going to be okay with this.  I can't."

"I think you are over-reacting about this," he responded calmly, standing to face her.  "Stop raising your voice, you are going to scare Betsy."

"Do not bring her into this.  She can hear me yell.  It will be good for her to see her mother not be a doormat."

"I'm not treating you like a doormat."

"No!  I could handle being the second wife, especially since you are a widower, but the third?  Are you kidding me?"

"I'm not like that anymore Cassandra.  I was young and didn't know what I wanted.  I had to figure it out and people got hurt in the process.  I'm sorry about that."

"It doesn't hold for me Don.  I'm young and you don't see me jumping into bed with 50 billion people to figure myself out."

"Cassandra you are walking a fine line here.  May I remind you that the precious little girl sitting on the floor over there is a result of just 'jumping into bed' with someone."

"It is not the same thing!" Cassandra  shrieked.  "How dare you..."

"You're not an innocent victim here, " Don interrupted.

Don picked up Betsy who was starting to fuss at all the yelling.
"Where are you taking her?" Cassandra asked in a sudden panic.
Don glared at Cassandra with disgust, "I'm taking her upstairs.  What did you think?  You need to calm down because this is ridiculous.  Betsy doesn't need to be scared while we finish this."
"No, you know what.  I'm finished right now.  I'm not talking about this anymore.  You should have been up front with me about everything and then this wouldn't have happened!  Now give me Betsy."

Don was not a man who resorted to begging or pleading for anything.  It had only happened once before and that was as Connie was being rushed to the hospital.  As Cassandra was walking out of their home he couldn't stop himself from rushing after her and pleading for them to work it out.  This wasn't just another failed relationship.  This time there was more on the line.

Cassandra had never seen Don react this way.  During high stress business meeting he was like steel.  Even if the company needed something during negotiations he would be willing to walk away if they weren't getting their way... and the other side would always cave in first.  Cassandra was expecting the same cool treatment from Don.

It caught her off guard when he followed her out of the house, and though she hesitated for a moment Cassandra made the decision to get in the cab.  She did not allow the tears to fall until they rounded the corner and the house was out of sight.  Don would not see her cry.  She thought of telling the cab driver to turn around.  Looking at the town as it sped past, Cassandra wondered if she was throwing away the one good thing she had.  When the cab crested the hill and the manor came into view Cassandra was reminded of the strength she carried from being a Goth.  She was going home.

Everyone was surprised when Cassandra came walking through the door announcing that she was moving home.  Everyone had wondered what had happened but it was something she refused to talk about.  She was hurt and heartbroken; then the anger started taking over.  Cassandra was angry with Don the most, he deserved her anger, but when her father smiled warmly and welcomed her home Cassandra stared at him with an anger that she held just for him.  Without a word she walked right past her father and headed upstairs to settle Betsy in their room.

~~~~~~~~~~

Life in the Goth home was changed after Cassandra moved the rest of her stuff home.  The teens felt like a dark cloud was looming over head.  Jada and Alexander were getting ready to graduate but everyone was too upset to plan any real celebrations.  They all wish Cassandra would snap out of her anger, especially because it seemed to be worse on the days she went to work; most likely because Don was at the office and Cassandra was not good at separating her personal life and her professional life.  Every morning Cassandra all but stormed out of the house.  Jada, Alexander, Floramaria, and Damen were all relieved to get on the bus and escape to school for part of the day.

Eventually, Bella had a word with Cassandra about finding an outlet for her feelings without taking it out on the rest of the family.  Cassandra took up painting again.  She would sit Betsy on the floor with a favorite toys and then lose herself in the world of watercolor. At first the painting were dark and monotone.  Then she began to branch out into more vibrant colors.  Cassandra family began to notice her getting back to her normal self.  Cassandra still had her bad days.  There were times when being at the office was unbearable as Don tried to woo her back with flowers and small gifts.  At the end of the day she would find her way back to the easel to paint her frustration.

Cassandra had lost her focus on what was right in front of her for awhile but she soon started to feel like life was getting back to normal.  Betsy was starting to say a few words.  It was like Cassandra was listening to angels speaking as Betsy babbled on.  Cassandra didn't think she could have loved Betsy any more than she already did but every time her sweet daughter learned a new work Cassandra's heart would swell with pride and love and glee.  There were times when she longed for Betsy to be her sweet, snuggling baby.  Most of the time Cassandra was grateful to mother such an amazing child.  Then it seemed that the only thing missing from her life was Sheldon.

Despite Mortimer's and Cassandra's unresolved issues, Bella was thrilled to have her daughter and grand-daughter back in the manor.  All of her children were almost grown.  Bella didn't realized how much she would miss the thumping and stomping of little feet.

Jada and Alexander had moved out right after graduation.  Bella was not thrilled that Cyrique was also moving into the new house with them but the three of them had been through it all in high school so it wasn't that much of a surprise.  Bella did hope for Jada's sake that the new responsibilities of adulthood wouldn't drive a wedge between Jada and Cyrique.

Mortimer couldn't understand why Cassandra wasn't coming around to the reason he dug up Don's life in Riverview.  The least he could do was try to show he really had their best interest at heart by helping out with Betsy when he could.  Mortimer enjoyed teaching Betsy to walk.  When he had first learned of Cassandra's pregnancy he was livid, but now he could look into grand-daughter's eyes and see the future of his family; so much potential and hope held inside a little girl who could barely walk and said nothing be than a few syllables of nonsense.

~~~~~~~~~~

Cassandra woke up in a strange bed without her clothes.  There was a dull, throbbing ache in her head, her eyes felt like she could rub sand out of them, and her mouth felt full of cotton; Cassandra had a hangover.  She quickly pulled her pants back on and threw her shirt over her head.  Cassandra went in search for some food and mulled over the events of the previous night.  She clearly remembers dropping of Betsy and Darryl and Zephyr's house and she clearly remembers arriving at the club.  After that it all became a blur.  The house was familiar, it wasn't so strange, and while she ate the memories of the previous night came creeping back.  Cassandra became still as she realized exactly where she was, who she was with, and what she had done.

It was a hot night at the club and Cassandra completely let go of herself for once.  What started as a couple of drinks turned into a shuffleboard drinking game against a couple of people from Bridgeport.  That is when she noticed Monte Alto was also in the club and she roped him into the game.  When the bar closed they were three sheets to the wind and Monte offered to take Cassandra home.  As the limo pulled drove into Sunset Valley Cassandra had told Monte that she wasn't ready to go home and they decided to continue the night as a private party at his pool side bar.

Recalling the night, Cassandra realized that it wasn't the next morning but it was two mornings later.  It was in the early hours of the morning when they had gotten back to the Alto mansion.  Monte served up another round of drinks and Cassandra remembered sitting at the bar and watching the sun rise over the ocean in the distance.  Without needing to be anywhere Cassandra just kept drinking and dancing and flirting and not caring about anything else in the world.  She sent a quick text off to her mom so she wouldn't worry and then shut her phone off.

Cassandra didn't know how it happened or why, but when her lips met Monte's it was as if her body went into a free fall and he was the only thing keeping her from hitting the ground.  Kissing him was nice and beyond nice and definitely not right, yet she could not pull away.
Slowly Cassandra wrapped her arms around Monte and sank into his body.  His kisses were making her dizzy, or maybe it was the alcohol, either way she didn't care.  She went to pull away but Monte's hand ran up her back to her neck and he held her in, kissing her deeply before letting her go.

Monte held Cassandra's face in his hands.  Her face was soft and her lips a cherry red and plump from their kiss moments ago.  He wanted to kiss her again.  Monte leaned in and placed a small kiss on her mouth before he broken the silence that was engulfing them, "I'm giving you one out Cass.  Walk away now and this will never had happened.  I'll call my driver and he can take you home."  Monte paused for a moment, fighting the urge to forget what he said and kiss her again.  "I'm not an honorable man and what ever you decide does not guarantee anything.  You can go or you can stay. If you stay, I'm taking you upstairs."

Cassandra's thought were racing a mile a minute.  Through all of their childhood and through all of high school she had never had even an inkling of interest in Monte, yet her she was on the ledge, willing to jump, and Monte was willing to catch her.  Asking him to call the driver was on the tip of her tongue but that was quelled by her lust, anger, and pain.  Cassandra pulled Monte close and answered his offer with a passionate kiss of her own.  How she got up to his room, which was more like a suite, was a mystery.  She definitely didn't remember her way there.  She was pretty sure she was still fully clothed when they shut the door but had most it stripped off before they fell on to his bed.

Cassandra hesitated for a moment.  There was a gorgeous man lying almost naked right in front of her and she couldn't get her internal dialogue to shut up.  Out of all of the times she didn't want to think and just feel, this was when her mind was playing devil's advocate.  Cassandra caught the glimmer of her diamond ring out of the corner of her eye and felt a flash of regret before she reminded herself of his lies.  She slipped the ring from her finger and leaned over Monte to put it out of sight in his bedside table.  He reached up and pulled her down to him.

Cassandra was the most experienced lover but she knew what she wanted out of the night.  Monte went to maneuver himself in a position of control.  Cassandra pushed him back onto the mattress and straddled his firm body.  Monte easily could have flipped her underneath but he was intrigued by the passion and tenacity in her endeavor for dominance.  If her fervor in bed was anything like her obstinacy in the boardroom, then Monte was in for a night to remember.  The idea alone increased increased his urge to have her.  Monte conceded to Cassandra's control and rode her waves of ecstasy.

~~~~~~~~~~

Cassandra's new sense of normal was thrown for a loop when Don showed up to the manor in the middle of the night.  She had only just started speaking to him at the office and now he was in front of her pleading to work through their problem instead of just throwing it all away.  Cassandra was conflicted.  She wanted to walk away with a clean break.  Take a chance at finding happiness elsewhere.  The problem was she still loved Don, and even worse walking away completely would mean walking away from Sheldon , which would be like walking away from her own child.  It would be anything but a clean break.

Cassandra invited Don into the house with the stipulation that there would be no yelling and he would leave if she asked.
"Cassandra, look I'm sorry for what this has done to us," Don started.  "I have realized over these weeks that I should have talked to you about everything.  Nothing will be left unsaid between us from now on."  Don noticed that Cassandra wasn't wearing her ring.
"Is is too late for us?" he asked.
"I just don't know Don," Cassandra responded.  "Why?  Do I have to know right now?"
"You aren't wearing your ring..."
"I put it away for safe keeping," she lied.  Her mind was racing.  Cassandra did not want to bring this up now but she knew if she was going to ask Don to not leave anything out in the future then she would have to come clean.
"Don, you have no idea how tempting it is for me just to say yes and have everything be right again.  There is just so much, you don't even know.  I need you to come back tomorrow.  Please."

The next morning, as soon as it was humanly reasonable to place a call, she excused herself to the balcony.  She needed to get her ring back and as a courtesy let Monte know she was going to come clean about their one night stand.

"Monte, listen to me.  I left my ring in your nightstand and I need you to bring it in to the office so I can have back.

"Yes, I'm going to marry Don and I can only do that if I tell him .

"Don't do this Monte.  You said it yourself, 'no guarantees'.  I will not deny that it was be a night I will remember for the rest of my life, but it was once and it is not enough for me to stop loving him.

"You can be pissed, but I want my ring back." and Cassandra hung up the phone.  It was back to business as usual.

Don came back the next day just as she asked.  Before he arrived Cassandra made sure to clear the house.  Floramaria and Damen were sent off to their friends houses and Cassandra asked her mom and dad to take Betsy out for the evening.  As they left Cassandra told her father that it was her intention to reconcile with Don and that if he would have her back both he and Sheldon would be moving into the manor.
Cassandra was a nervous wreck.  She would much rather face the most ruthless business tycoon than admit to her night with Monte.
"Before we talk anymore about the future I need to say something and I need you to remember that you broke my heart," Cassandra began.

The words caught in her throat.  There was no way she was going to be able to do this without ruining everything.  Now that she was on the precipice of losing what she had by her own actions, did she realize how much she truly wanted Don in her life.

"Cassandra, I screwed up there is no reason for this to be so hard on you."

"Stop," she paused.  "I slept with someone while we were separated."  Cassandra blurted it out just to get it out of her head.  The room became so silent she could have heard a pin drop.

"I'm sorry...excuse me...what did you just..." Don stammered.

Cassandra jumped in before Don could go completely off the wall, "Look I know you are pissed and you have every right to be.  I have no way to even explain this.  All I can say is that I am ashamed and so sorry." She had meant it with the whole of her heart; Cassandra was ashamed that she had cheated, she was even more ashamed that she had enjoyed it so much though that thought would never be shared.
"Shit, Cassandra.  I don't know how you lay this out there and expect us to fix us in one night.  You walked out on me and I gave you space because I thought that is what you wanted and needed.  It was hypocritical move.  Should I just turn around and walk out now?"

"No!" Cassandra exclaimed.  "I'm laying it out there so we can start with us knowing everything.  Nothing is hidden."

"Who was it?" Don wanted to know.

"Does it matter?  Please don't do this."

"Cassandra if you want to get past this then I need to know who."

"I'm begging you to not do this.  We don't even need to get married and just start fresh from a new place."

"Who?  It's the last time I'm asking before I walk out the door.  You want a fresh start and I want to know who.  We start there."

Cassandra sighed, "It was Monte."

"For fuck sake, him?  Out of all the guys in this neighborhood why him?"

"Because I was drunk and he was there."

They both said nothing; neither one of them willing to cut into the tension, neither one knowing what step to take next.

Update 2.4

Viola took to mothering her children quite well.  She figured that if her mother could raise children then it should be a cake-walk for her.

The advantage her mother had was that she only had one kid at a time.  It seemed like just when she was finished with one, the other would need immediate attention.  Viola was becoming a pro at stretching her bladder and suppressing the urge to eat.

Viola kept in contact with her family back in Bridgeport through e-mail.  She hated technology in general but she missed everyone so much that she didn't mind hopping on the computer every once and awhile.

There was no formal police investigation into Danial's death but William had stored the ashes to make a case against Vlad if he could.  Eventually they needed to release the remains back to the family.  Viola couldn't contact Jessica herself so she asked her father to get the remains for her.  It was a fight against Danial's fiance but Jessica decided to give the remains to William so he could send them to Viola.  Viola began to build a memorial garden for her lost love.

Moonlight Falls was a sleepy little town compared to Bridgeport and Viola decided that to fully start her life over she would need a change in her look as well.  For the better part of a year she had kept to the house, still afraid to go outside.  Now that her twins were almost a year old she wanted to explore her new hometown better and fit in.

Even though it was just the twins and herself, Viola was determined to make their birthday special.  She helped them blow out their candles in order of birth.  First to have their birthday was little Kailey.

Followed by her twin brother Kesler.

Though they didn't hear from Danial's family very often, Jessica and Rafael sent some dolls for the twins on their birthday.  A cute green one for Kailey...

...and an orange doll for Kesler.  She took a picture of the twins and sent them back to her family and Danial's family.

Viola headed out into the town she was unfamiliar with.  On her way to the Commonwealth Court Viola met reporter Chauncey Grimm who was there to do a story.

Viola wasn't running out of money, but she decided to get a job to bring some normalcy to her and the twins lives.  Since the criminal career got her into a load of trouble Viola got a job with the police department.

Viola attended an amateur night at one of the local spots and even worked up the courage to play the guitar herself.

Viola left her precious twins in the care of a babysitter and headed off to her first day of being a snitch.  She called home several times that day to checked to make sure everything was okay.

After the babysitter reassured her for the 15th time that all was well at the Talon house Viola decided to head over to the park where there seemed to be a lot of activity.  She saw a witch performing a spell on a human, a couple a werewolves on a picnic, and a ghost just floating by.  The ghost was intriguing and Viola hoped to find out more.

Viola joined Chauncey for a picnic and talked about the supernatural for a bit.  She asked him for all he knew about ghosts.

One night while she was out Viola met the oldest vampire that she had ever come across before.  He was much older than any of the vampires back in the city.  Viola was nervous at first and thought of leaving but she soon discovered that this vampire was nothing like the vampires of Bridgeport.

Both twins started to show their vampire abilities early, but Kesler more than Kailey.  Viola saw him biting his doll often.  Some days she would look at him and he would seem so much more different than his sister.  It was odd.

Viola began to hone her mind-reading skills.  Her reasons were two-fold; she was going to become a well disciplined and powerful vampire in case Vlad ever did find her and mind-reading sure did help out with being a snitch.

Viola wasn't quite sure she was ready to jump back into the dating pool but when Chauncey called and asked her out she didn't really feel like telling him no.  He was a great guy who was fun to be around so she was willing to give it a shot.

Viola hadn't had a drop of human blood since she left Bridgeport, which came up in conversation when Chauncey asked about her life.  He was a big supernatural fan and offered to let Viola take a drink from him.  Viola hesitated for a moment and then leaned in to nip at his jugular  leaving her feeling incredibly satiated and him feeling incredibly high.

Chapter 20: The Real Don Lothario

"There was nothing special about my childhood.  I had an ordinary family in an ordinary neighborhood.  I was an only child and my parents were quite older when they had me.  They had both died by the time I had become a young adult.  It wasn't tragic, I mourned them and then I moved on with life.  I was hired at Doo Peas and began working my way up the corporate ladder.

"I did not have any close relationships in Riverview.  I wasn't really a loner but I didn't need twenty different friends either.  The closest friend that I had was Connie.  Now she was a loner but we enjoyed new movies, concerts, art shows, pretty much anything.  She worked on the journalism side of the building but we met up and stayed up to date with what was going on in each other's lives.

"As a young filing clerk I entered into a sexual relationship with my boss Hannah Jones.  Being as young as I was, I convinced myself I was in love with her.  The affair had only been going on for a couple of months before she asked to meet me outside of work.  Hannah then hit me with the news that she was pregnant and that she was sure it was mine.  I did question the possibility since I was sure she was still sleeping with her husband but she admitted that in all the years they were married she had not been able to conceive.

"As naive as I was, I took her word for it.  In the end she wasn't wrong.  The baby was mine.  I was initially excited at the idea of having a baby and believed that Hannah would make a wonderful mother.  I wanted to do right by them and asked Hannah to leave her husband so we could be a family together.

"Hannah's divorce took no time at all.  They had no children and she had a pre-nup because of her family's large estate.  As soon as we could we rushed to city hall to be married so the baby would be born into a legitimate family and have my last name rather then her ex-husband's last name.  She decided to let her house sit empty and we bought a smaller house that we could call our own.

"The honeymoon phase did not last very long.  I began to work long hours to make up for her maternity leave since I was making less than what she was getting for maternity pay.  It seemed that she would be waiting every night just to start complaining about something when I got home.  Our fighting became so frequent that I eventually stopped coming home on some nights just to avoid her rages.

"Hannah and I were barely speaking to one another by the time it was time for her to have the baby.  In fact I didn't even get the call at work until the baby was already born. We ended up having a son who we named Zeke. I thought our life would get back to normal after we had the baby but it seemed like the fighting never stopped.  We just started to fight about other, unimportant things.  Eventually she started accusing me of cheating on her because of my absence from the home, but I hadn't.

"One day I decided enough was enough and I demanded a divorce.  I was through with living in so much hatred.  I couldn't even remember the last time I told her that I loved her.  I was young and didn't want to be held down in my life so I told her it would be best if she just took Zeke and left.  I promised that I would provide for Zeke, but I wanted a care free lifestyle.

"I dated on and off after the divorce but I primarily focused on my career.  I fulfilled my financial obligation to Hannah and Zeke but I wasn't interesting in being a father.  My next big relationship was with a much older woman named Rhoda; she had her own children and when I asked her to move in I was thrown into a parenting roll. Spending time with her toddler sparked an interest in me to see Zeke.

"It had been a couple of years and I was pretty lucky that Hannah was willing to let me into Zeke's life.  I know a lot of women out there wouldn't give another thought to a man who wasn't around for their child.  At first we just met in public places and allowed for Zeke to get to know me.  There was no point in scaring the child by handing him off to a man he doesn't know.

"My relationship with Rhoda didn't last.  We were at different places in our lives and wanted different things.  I did keep seeing Zeke though.  I still wasn't the fatherly type but I enjoyed spending the day with the little guy.  Both Hannah and I agreed that overnights weren't an option until Zeke was older.  It was interesting when I heard Zeke call me 'Daddy' for the first time because I sure did not think of myself as a daddy, rather I felt like just a father.

"I was climbing the corporate ladder and through a few business and social events I met a doctor named Shirley Lin.  We connected  almost immediately.  Over time I truly fell in love with her and started to feel like it was the right time to settle down and settle into family life.  I had learned my lesson with Hannah and was going to do right with Shirley and make absolute certain that this was what we both wanted.

"We had casually talked about marriage some when we had time together.  Our respective careers made it hard for us to spend time together.  We spent a quiet evening at the bookstore when I decided that a simple on the spot proposal would be perfect for Shirley.  I had wanted to do something big but the timing was right.  I had asked and she said yes.  I thought my life was finally on track to go where I want it to go.

"Soon after our engagement Shirley's twin sister Roxie came home while she was in between tours.  You'll be familiar with Roxie if you've ever heard of the band Wireless Functional; Roxie is the lead singer.  Well, they weren't the closest of twins and I got caught up in the middle of it all.  Shirley was sweet, funny, intelligent, and caring; Roxie was the opposite.  She was gritty, crass, sexy, and bold.

"Looking back, I knew better.  I should have been a better man.  I went to bed with Roxie, and at first I figured it would be a one night stand, then it continued through all of Shirley's overnight shifts.  I rationalized the situation to myself; in the end I was going to stop by the time we were going to get married.  I suppose I was itching to get caught, like all of the television psychologist say, because I was careless.  Shirley came home early one night and found us in bed together.

"I expected screaming, yelling, tears, maybe even for Shirley to slap me or punch her sister but none of those things happened. She calmly walked over to me, handed the ring back and told me that I needed to be gone when she got back.  She never even breathed a word to Roxie and then she left.  I'll never really know if our romance was wishful thinking or if I truly broke her heart.  We didn't see each other often after that night.

"I didn't sell my place after moving in with Shirley so I packed up and went there.  I had a couple one night stands and threw myself back into work at the office.  Some weeks there were several day in a row that I wouldn't leave. Connie noticed my lack of a social life and lured me out with concert tickets.  She was supposed to meet a guy she met on a dating website but her investigative reporter senses kicked in and she looked him up ahead of time and decided he wasn't her type.  I went to the concert with her so she wouldn't feel like the tickets were a waste of money.

"We never called our nights out "dates", but I suppose that is what they were to everyone else.  At some point my feelings for Connie developed beyond the friendship we had.  I found myself in love with her.  I didn't act on it right away.  I knew I had so much to lose this time around because if I lost Connie then I would have had nothing.  Eventually I came around to telling her only to find out that she was feeling the same way.

"We ended up moving in with each other first and took our growing relationship slow.  Being my best friend she knew about all of my screwed up relationships and we didn't want that to happen with us.  On the evening of our first anniversary of living together I took Connie out to the bistro.  After dinner and dessert I asked her to marry me.  She said yes, though I would have understood if she said no.

"We didn't wait nearly as long to get married.  Our engagement was long enough to plan a small wedding.  We invited over our co-workers and a small group of close friends for an intimate little wedding on our front porch.  We had ourselves a mostly traditional ceremony, but it was quick and to the point.  Neither one of us wanted to stand up in front of everybody for a long amount of time.

"The reception was lovely.  I had finally gotten it right.  I went through a lot to get to the point where I could truly appreciate the amazing woman I could call my wife.  I wanted to be perfect for her; no fighting and no cheating, just hard work and all the love I could give her. As long as I could call her mine for as long as I lived.  I never really thought past the moment of bliss we were in.

"Shortly after our honeymoon Connie spent a lot her time wrapped around the toilet.  She was getting sick all the time.  We both knew in the back of our heads that we were both where we needed to be to start a family but since we were just back from a exotic place I worried that she had picked something up.  I also wasn't ready to admit that parenthood was going to happen so fast.  I talked her into going to the doctor, just in case it was some sort of parasite.

"I was so relieved when she told me the appointment had gone fine and that she was only pregnant and experiencing morning sickness.  We were ecstatic that she was pregnant even though we thought we would have had more time as newlyweds.  The planning started happening immediately. We put our one bedroom house up for sale and bought a three bedroom.  I figured I was going to have Zeke over more and that Connie and I would eventually have more, but that was much farther down the road.

"Connie was great with Zeke.  She was like a second mother to him.  He was close to becoming a child and Hannah thought that we had had enough time together to allow for overnight stays.  We loved the weekends when Zeke could stay with us.  Connie decorated his room and bought him his own toys for our house.  It was going to be even more perfect once the baby arrived. We were going to be a whole family.

"In the sixth month of the pregnancy Connie started to feel pain in her stomach and she was experiencing some bleeding.  I made her go to the doctor immediately and we were so glad we didn't wait.  The doctors discovered that the placenta had slipped down to cover her cervix.  She had placenta previa and the doctor ordered her to strict bed rest.

"I tried to make the best of the situation for her.  We were both terrified without  saying a word to the other.  I brought her a new book from the library every time she finished the last book but even a bookworm has her limits.  The office sent a laptop over for her, though I went rounds with them about giving Connie too much work and causing stress.  If we couldn't take care of her at home, then the doctor was going to admit her.

"I'll never forget the morning that I rushed out of the house with barely a kiss to her cheek to say good-bye, nor the moment when I got home and saw Connie through the window laying on the floor.  The front door was locked, and I know I had my keys, but all I knew was I need to get into the house.  I dropped everything I had and ran to the back door.

"The moment I ran into the living room and all I could see was the blood.  There was so much I could practically smell it.  Connie's placenta had ruptured and I didn't even know if she was alive.  Afterwards, I would learn that I had accidentally slipped her phone in my bag that morning and she was trying to get to the house phone in the kitchen when the blood loss became too much and she passed out at the bottom of the stairs.

"I called 911 as fast as I could.  The operator wanted me to try to stop the bleeding somehow but I knew she had already lost too much.  I couldn't think of what to do and felt helpless as the few minutes felt like hours.  I finally found myself kneeling down to her and gently holding her in my arms.  I held her close and whispered her name over and over.  I don't even know when the paramedics arrived.  I vaguely remember some fire fighters grabbing my arms so the paramedics could take her.

"She was still alive but there wasn't much the paramedics could do but get her to the hospital as fast as they could. I waited in the waiting room while they took her back.  Eventually, I wandered outside because I just couldn't take it anymore.  The doctor found me outside.  He suggested that I come inside and sit down.  I could tell from the look on his face that the news was not good.  I refused to go inside.  Her doctor finally relented and just told me that Connie's blood loss was too great and that she didn't make it through surgery, but that they were able to save our son who was in the pediatric intensive care.

"I had wanted to run and just leave everything. I couldn't have the baby without Connie.  I don't know what happened but I knew that I would be letting her down if I walked away.  I spent weeks monitoring our son in the PICU and while he slept I looked for a new job.  I wanted a fresh start for the both of us.  Connie's maiden name was Shellie and so I named our son Sheldon so he could always have a little piece of his mother.  When he was well enough to be released we moved here.  I had already accepted the job and bought this house.

"Cassandra, you became a part of my life in the first few weeks I was here.  You know everything that has happened after that.  All of this is the past; it should stay there.  My life in Riverview was ages ago and at times seems like a lifetime ago.  It has no bearing on the here and now."